thoughts

ReConditioner

Hello there! There are many ways to look at a situation.  You can look at it from the perspective that it is happening to you.  You can look at it as if it is happening around you.  You can also look at it as happening inside you.  Even still you can look at it as if it isn't happening at all… that it is all imaginary.  I tend to look at it in all ways, going through one to the next pretty quickly.  When I am faced with a stressful (my perception) situation I feel victimized for a very short time and then quickly move to what I can control.  It is hard to stay the course when so many things seem to be thrown at you to knock you off course.

Our minds are tricky things.  Thoughts zoom by at the speed of light.  It seems to be impossible to slow them down let alone to stop them altogether.  Often we have thoughts that stem from feelings arising and we immediately believe that everything that is happening for us is true or has to be true.  We are conditioned beings, we have been taught that one thing means another, we have associations that at some point were created not inherent.  In order to free ourselves from the conditioning we have to allow the feelings and thoughts to exist (they are rather persistent) and look at them with curiosity instead of giving them our complete trust.  When you can let go of what you have always believed to be true about a feeling or a thought you can start recreating your life and undoing the conditioning that may be doing you in.

All of this is easier said than done.  There will be things that push you where you feel weakest.  You will be in the middle of a bad week and something will come along to show you just how not bad it really was in comparison.  You will find yourself in a place where you look around and recognize barely anything, where nothing makes sense, where you feel a bit lost.  You will find yourself off track.  It is hard to not panic in these situations, it is hard not to find something, someone else to hold responsible for it.  Personal responsibility isn't something you can pick and choose to have.  You either practice it or you don't.  If you can move through the series of feelings and thoughts that keep you stuck and twisting in the wind you just might see the blessing in it.  You are being given another opportunity to create the world, the life, you claim you want.

Much love,

xo

a

Over and Over and Over

Howdy!!! Do you have anything that you can't let go of?  Thoughts that you hang on to?  Something happens with your friend and you feel not so yummy… so you go over and over and over what you said or what they said.  Maybe work sucked and you cannot get the feeling that you are going to get reprimanded out of your head.  Whether it has happened (past) or could happen (future) it is now, in this moment, imaginary.  It only exists in your head and in that way can morph any which way you choose it to.

When we obsess about an incident or an issue we often place ourselves as innocent bystanders.  We use language that keeps us victimized, such as, "it won't stop" or "I can't get it out of my head."  The real deal is you are choosing to focus on the tape that you have recorded and keep replaying it.  You choose what you replay.  You are also choosing to let it be true.  You are not a victim to your thoughts or emotions.  You may not do something consciously, but that doesn't mean you aren't in charge.  When you take ownership you are able to look at what you are doing with the power to change it if you would like to.  You aren't just sitting there subject to torturous thoughts.  You can choose to observe them, with a detached attitude, one that allows for information to be gathered.  Or you can choose to use your power to override those obsessive thoughts and tape over the recording.  After all, repeating thoughts isn't in and of itself the issue.  When the thought isn't desired a problem arises.  Replacing it with one that you would like to manifest is another way to let go and get going.

When you work on intentional thinking you begin to see the doorway that takes you from where you are to where you want to be.  Allowing yourself to be ruled by the endless chatter is laziness at its best.  To put the work into managing your mind, managing you internal world, managing you… well, that would leave you no time to obsess over someone else's feelings or issues with you.  They aren't your feelings, your issues and, when you do your work, you come to realize they are not about you to begin with.  Take some time, listen to the tape, rewind and erase if needed or replay it with a different attitude altogether.  The choice is always yours.

xo

a

You Thought It, You Brought It or On Scarcity - Part II

Hello! Years ago when I worked for Rutgers University as the Assistant Women's Rowing Coach I had a roommate.  She was an Academic Athletic Advisor.  One of her sports was actually rowing which made it easy to get work done since we shared a living space as well as needed to consult at work.  Inga was getting over a pretty significant relationship when I met her and was far from recovered.  Living and working together made us fast friends and able to speak on highly personal matters quickly.  She told me about her ex on a daily basis.  Aubrey was mormon and had been disowned by her family in Utah when she fell in love with Inga.  They had driven out to NJ where Aubrey, realizing the gravity of having no family and that she wasn't ready for the commitment the relationship would need, left her to go home to Salt Lake and work on reconnecting with her family.  Inga had become basically despondent outside of work and felt utterly alone.  Aubrey was all she could think about.

We moved into a new place, after subletting for a short time in order to really get a handle on where we wanted to live, and one of the first things Inga noticed was the name of the appliances in the kitchen: Aubrey.  She cursed and mentioned something about it being just her luck.  I thought it was pretty interesting that the very person she wanted to work on forgetting wouldn't go away in her own mind and in her own kitchen.

A few months after we had settled in I began dating someone new.  I was pretty excited because I just knew that this was a significant relationship in my life.  Now, up until I met Inga I had actually never known anyone named Aubrey.  Shortly after meeting her I learned of her ex and that there were appliances by that name.  Then came my Aubrey.  We began dating and I kept it under wraps from Inga wondering how she would take having to hear and say that name once again.  Inga handled the news with a similar curse as the one after the appliance discovery and then got over it with grace.  After Aub and I ended our relationship I discovered the shampoo of the same name. :)  It is actually really good stuff that my sister uses regularly, FYI.

It is the case that what you focus on comes up in your life, period.  Have you ever seen a friend's new car only to now see that car everywhere?  Was it there before?  Are you now noticing it because it has been pointed out?  It may be a bit of both, but it most certainly takes attention to bring it into your world.  What if your focus was directed instead of haphazard?  What if you set an intention instead of allowed your mind to be molded by what we hear and see on TV, radio, newspapers, magazines, etc.?  What is it that you would like to see?  Where is your focus?  If you want to know what you believe and think about regularly, look at your life.  If you believe that there isn't enough of something or that we are all doomed, then doom is what you will see and inevitably create.  If you would like to see the abundance of love in the world, not only will you see it, you will be it as well.

We have the power to bring into existence what we love yet we continue to bring into the world what we fear.  We create scarcity by believing that there isn't enough.  We create lack of love by believing we are alone and disconnected.  We create hate by breeding it within.  In order to live in a loving, supportive, abundant place we have to believe, despite outward appearances, that this place already exists and see it no matter what.  We have to refuse to buy into what we outwardly 'see' and 'believe' to be true.  Change your mind and your reality changes.  Change your view to something new.

xo

a

Be Your Own Master

Good Thursday to you! What if the only thing you were supposed to be great at was being you? My sister has said many times, "the only work you have here in this life is you… you are your work." I have found this to be sooo true in sooo many ways (in every way actually). However, I have seen this concept totally and completely irritate, confound and simply piss others off. Most people have no desire to master themselves. It is "too hard" to pay attention to everything that we do, some have said. I have also heard, "It is impossible to be aware of everything we do." To that I say, well, if that is what you believe then that will be your reality. However, have you ever tried? Do you know what it is like to spend most of your time mastering your thoughts, your behaviors, yourself? True power comes when you are your own master.

You are born into this world knowing what you want immediately and not doubting that it is yours to be had. You are connected to the world you prefer in a way that is somewhat unshakeable at first.  You spend an amazing amount of time working on shaping your world.  Learning how to talk so that you can get more of what you would like.  We have all heard children talk about how they see the world and we sometimes consider their viewpoints "magical" due to the fact that they don't always correspond to the views we have of the world. We also have felt a sense of loss at the fact that we don't seem to have that "magical" thinking anymore. Well we do have magical thinking, it is our birthright and all it takes is being your own master mind.

We spend years working on mastering this or that or the other… but balk at the idea of mastering ourselves. Most people will spend 8 or 9 hours straight working for someone, typing on the computer, watching TV or talking to friends/family; yet spending the same amount of time practicing how to make what we believe in a reality is "too hard." The reality of being intentional about our thoughts, shaping them around our ideals and not letting them go despite the appearance of things on the outside is not something that most people are waking up at 7am to do. When we were young we saw what we wanted to see and our worlds conformed for us. I am always amazed at the saying of "God takes care of fools and babies." I think I understand that the fools and the babies have magical thinking in common… they believe that the world is their to support them and so it does. I don't see anything foolish about that.

What if you spent a period of time daily where you were intentional with your thoughts. See what it is like to be relentless in your discipline around only allowing thoughts that supported your ideals about everything. For example, I have what some say is 'parking karma.' This means that I always get the best, or nearly the best, parking spot when I am out and about. I see the world in this way (around this subject): There is a spot for me when I need it. It is the only thought I allow in when it comes to parking.

"Every appearance in the visible world tends to produce a corresponding form in the mind which observes it, and this can only be prevented by holding the thought of TRUTH."  (Truth being what you would prefer to be such as parking spots, health, abundance). ~Wallace Wattles

Have fun playing with your own personal magic!!!

xo

a