Hello there! There are many ways to look at a situation.  You can look at it from the perspective that it is happening to you.  You can look at it as if it is happening around you.  You can also look at it as happening inside you.  Even still you can look at it as if it isn't happening at all… that it is all imaginary.  I tend to look at it in all ways, going through one to the next pretty quickly.  When I am faced with a stressful (my perception) situation I feel victimized for a very short time and then quickly move to what I can control.  It is hard to stay the course when so many things seem to be thrown at you to knock you off course.

Our minds are tricky things.  Thoughts zoom by at the speed of light.  It seems to be impossible to slow them down let alone to stop them altogether.  Often we have thoughts that stem from feelings arising and we immediately believe that everything that is happening for us is true or has to be true.  We are conditioned beings, we have been taught that one thing means another, we have associations that at some point were created not inherent.  In order to free ourselves from the conditioning we have to allow the feelings and thoughts to exist (they are rather persistent) and look at them with curiosity instead of giving them our complete trust.  When you can let go of what you have always believed to be true about a feeling or a thought you can start recreating your life and undoing the conditioning that may be doing you in.

All of this is easier said than done.  There will be things that push you where you feel weakest.  You will be in the middle of a bad week and something will come along to show you just how not bad it really was in comparison.  You will find yourself in a place where you look around and recognize barely anything, where nothing makes sense, where you feel a bit lost.  You will find yourself off track.  It is hard to not panic in these situations, it is hard not to find something, someone else to hold responsible for it.  Personal responsibility isn't something you can pick and choose to have.  You either practice it or you don't.  If you can move through the series of feelings and thoughts that keep you stuck and twisting in the wind you just might see the blessing in it.  You are being given another opportunity to create the world, the life, you claim you want.

Much love,



Needs & Preferences

"Happiness happens when your consciousness is not dominated by addictions and demands--and you experience life as a parade of preferences" ~Ken Keyes, Jr. We tend to believe that our way is the way and that anyone doing it differently is wrong.  Our addiction to how we do things (and that is what it is) tends to lead us down a road of struggle, conflict, unease and unhappiness.  When you need something to be a certain way there isn't much space for it to be different and for you to be ok.  How many times do you get what you need when dealing with people who aren't you?  How often are you feeling offended that your needs aren't being met?  Whose responsibility is it to meet your needs?

Where does love come into play?  How do you love others when you want them to be other than what they are?  When you aren't ok with what is, what's happening for you?  Generally your emotional programming is being disturbed when the external world doesn't conform to your internal programming/conditioning.  When you let go of needing or being addicted to having things be a certain way you begin to see things as they are and simply, that they are.  You begin to see that we are all doing what we need to be doing, regardless of your own values and beliefs.  You begin to see how we are all creating the world we live in, whether it be based on acceptance, love, or addictions.

Where can you let go of the need to control what other people do or do not do?  How can you find the love and acceptance for yourself and then let that spill out to others?  How can preferences replace needs in your world?

Work from the inside out.  :)