grace

What's Good???

Good Morning!!! Tuesday Gratitude Practice is here!!!  How will you take what you are grateful for through the rest of your day?  This isn't just about writing it down and sending it back…  put it out there!  Let the world feel your appreciation!  Let's make a difference.  

This only  takes a few moments to do but gives to you for much, much longer.  So put down whatever you are doing and take a couple of minutes for yourself.  Every Tuesday morning I am going to ask you to write down 5 things that you are grateful for and email them to me (keep for yourself as well).  What are you feeling gratitude around?  Here are mine for this week:

Tabitha, my favorite baby girl kitty.

Drugs that put my Tabbers out of misery quickly.

Breaker.

Carnwath.

Keach.  

There are no right or wrong answers.  It is about what you are grateful for.   It is proven that doing this once a week for three months (actually just 9 weeks) makes you happier, healthier, exercise more and less sensitive to perceived slights.  You will sweat the small stuff less and focus on what really matters.

So… what are you waiting for???

Food for thought:

Losing someone you love is so f*cking annoying.  I remember when my nephew died I just couldn't believe it.  Then it was that I couldn't believe nothing could be done to reverse the situation.  Then it was just what the f*ck??!!  Losing Tabitha has been this frustrating thing for me.  I just had no desire for her to be gone.  I am simply not in the mood to lose my baby kitty.  Life isn't about waiting for your mood to be just so, however, and it isn't always what you would want to happen that happens.  Nope, sometimes you are literally just observing shit.

I am in a place where I don't yet know why she passed.  I don't know what the universe wants me to know about her leaving.  I know that it was her time, it was destined on some level for her to be gone now, but what am I to get out of it… well I think I may need to give it a few more days to settle and then maybe the reasons will begin to flood in.  

There is one thing, I believe, this has done for me.  I feel fearless on some levels, once again.  When Miles passed I remember feeling like the worst thing that could happen had happened, so what did I have to worry about ever again.  As time has passed the feeling of Miles' passing isn't as intense or raw and my feelings of fearlessness aren't as dramatic.  With Tabbers leaving I am feeling like all bullshit in my life (Imean all people who are full of it) need to get to steppin'.  Seriously.  I believe, at this very moment, Tabbers being gone makes me want, even more fervently, quality in my world.  She was the top of the top of animals.  Beautiful, smart, funny, loving, crazy as hell, sneaky, super quick, Whodini kitty (as one of my best friend's pointed out) and mine.  Her being gone makes me realize, even deeper than I live it, how important having quality in my world is.

You and I deserve the best, period.

xo

a

Get To Give

Hiya, I know all about refusing help.  I know all about wanting to "do it all on my own."  When I was a teenager I realized that my parents weren't that interested in raising me anymore.  So I felt like a burden and it was something I refused to ever feel like again.  So I set about taking care of my damn self.  I paid for all things associated with my high school graduation, my college tuition and life during and after.  I divorced my parents, essentially.  So I grew up feeling like it was just me.  In this deluded state I abused relationships inadvertently.  Because I wasn't quite ready to be on my own but could hustle I got on by the skin of my teeth.  I have lived in a friend's basement, I have almost been evicted more than once, I have stayed in relationships because I was more secure financially that way than if I was on my own.  I have done a million things to survive, but rarely when I was younger, did I truly realize how the universe supported me, and in turn, I didn't always truly appreciate the help I was given.  No matter how hard things became, I was ALWAYS ok.  Nothing ginormous went wrong.  I am so glad that I appreciate the gifts I am given now.  LIfe is so much more rich when your recognize how much love is just waiting around you to lift you up.

I understand at this point that it is a futile attempt to do it on your own because you honestly can do NOTHING by yourself.  Unless you sprung from nothing in the middle of nothing you have been helped from the moment someone ejaculated and another ovulated.  Your ass has been supported.  So get over yourself.  There is the fact that you are sitting on something reading this, or you are using some expensive ass piece of equipment to read it on.  People made those things.  They were built to support you and anyone else that comes into contact with them.  You travel on a road to get from home to wherever and those roads were built by peeps, and maintained by peeps.  You get food that is grown and/or prepared by someone other than you.  You have electricity.  You have heat… You have support in so many ways that are so taken for granted.  It is time to appreciate what you have been given and stay open to receive more. 

When you resist the help that is available, when you deny that you are blessed you aren't able to create larger more expansive blessings.  Or, if you have an issue with needing help you will be put in a position where you have no choice but to take it.  We like to do things the hard way for some reason.  The way isn't necessarily hard.  If you are in a place where help is needed you know it.  You have a little voice that can grow louder if you allow it.  Let it… hear what it has to tell you.  Thank everyone around you who helps you out.  Needing help doesn't make you weak, it makes you human… and a part of the flow of life. 

Receiving help is also a form of giving.  You are giving to someone the opportunity to feel useful, supportive, loving.  Why deny that from anyone?  How can you help someone by allowing them to help you?  Where are you denying someone the chance to be of assistance?  Why?

xo

a