family

What's Good???

Good morning! It is Tuesday!!  :)  Gratitude breeds more gratitude… isn't that awesome?   This only  takes a few moments to do but gives to you for much, much longer.  So put down whatever you are doing and take a couple of minutes for yourself.  Every Tuesday morning I am going to ask you to write down 5 things that you are grateful for and email them to me (keep for yourself as well).  What are you feeling gratitude around?  Here are mine for this week:

Calm.

Electricity.

Cheerleading Championships.

Strangers becoming friends.

Vacuums.  

There are no right or wrong answers.  It is about what you are grateful for.   It is proven that doing this once a week for three months (actually just 9 weeks) makes you happier, healthier, exercise more and less sensitive to perceived slights.  You will sweat the small stuff less and focus on what really matters.

So… what are you waiting for???

Food for thought:

It matters what you say, how you say it and when you say it.  It matters that you think before you speak.  It matters that you take into consideration who is listening.  That does not mean, however, that you change what you would have said if you hadn't taken these things into consideration… it just means that you have been thoughtful, you have looked at the possibilities so that you can decide what you want to do, instead of just unconsciously doing it.

During this holiday season, as we share space and time with family (blood relatives or chosen family), it is important that we are thoughtful around what, how and when we say whatever it is that we say.  We tend to take family for granted.  We often treat those closest to us the worst.  We believe that it is ok to treat family with little to no regard sometimes.  It is key that you understand the point of family is to practice relationship, like every other human connection you have been in, will be in, or currently are in.  Relationship is about bringing you closer to yourself and family is no different.  Would you like to be treated the way you treat others?  If you cannot answer in the affirmative begin behaving differently.

How can you love yourself by loving your family today?

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!!  

xo

a

Family Time

Howdy!!! During a time when family comes together we are sometimes reminded of why they spend time apart.  When you are close to people they know you.  They know you so well in some ways… especially the parts of you that you don't enjoy and they seem to have a knack for bringing those parts to the surface.  We may not want to have times with our families that are stressful, especially when the focus is giving thanks.  However, it isn't by accident that we are triggered by our loved ones.  It is because of the closeness, the connection, that we are shown the things that we must work on within ourselves if we so choose.  Being around your family is a gift, even if it doesn't come with a bow tied around it.

It is more the case than not judgement will be made when families come together.  Either you will be judged or you will judge.  It might seem innocent, you may feel like you are helping or giving an answer to some question or another.  But, as I told a friend earlier today, if you are giving information to your family and it isn't about sharing then you may be guided by ego.  You may be telling them what to do without actually getting permission to do so.  For some reason we believe that we have the right to say whatever we want to our families.  Everyone feels judgement and everyone (healthy) resists it.  So be careful, know why you are saying what you are saying.  Operate out of love, curiosity and a desire to give.  Your family won't feel so resistant to you if so.  Additionally, know that everyone is doing their best… it may not be what you want, but it is where they are and it is their best in that moment."

Know that you are where you are also.  Give thanks for you being you, knowing that without them you wouldn't be who you are.  Who you are is precious, beautiful, deliberate.  Since this is true for you, this is true for your family too.  Remember how hard it is to change yourself… not imagining trying to change someone else.  Use your holiday time as a time for healing, for crossing over the stream of life and learning what things you never ever leave behind.  You just cross it at different grades on the ascent to wisdom.  Life is a never-ending, ever-changing, momentary thing.  Take the time you have with the ones you love and love them.  Love the parts you don't enjoy and love the parts you love even more.

Happy Thanks Be Given :)

xo

a

What A Trip

Heya, What a trip I've had. Sometimes trips are just trips. You go, you see, you do various things, you come home... You aren't really challenged and therefore you aren't really changed. Then there are trips that shape you, shift you.  You go, you see and then you discover something else, something you didn't know you needed to discover.

When I traveled to South Africa a few years ago I learned much more than I could have dreamt.  I was shoved into clarity around many areas I had been foggy on. My priorities came clear.  I had been in a troubled relationship and ties needed to be cut definitively.  I was working in advertising and felt completely unfulfilled. I was coaching rowing and didn't think it was exactly where I would end up, it felt too small but I wasn't sure what was next.  I saw South Africans disliking themselves the same way African-Americans do.  I had conversations with white South Africans who felt African-Americans shouldn't call themselves African.  I spent time on safari and realized I hadn't been really still… really, until then.  It was an amazing trip.

This trip was pretty similar.  Work stuff has been clarified and I am ready and excited for growth and expansion.  I connected with my family in ways I've always wanted to.  I feel clearer on my next steps in my life and love.  I am healing faster when I'm hurt seeing people wanting to be other than who they are.  I know where I'm going and why I've taken the roads I've taken to get here. It's all pretty great. There is an excited stillness that comes over me when I am living my life's purpose. There is a confident knowing. There is love.

How do you feel when you feel like you are on the right track? What sensations are associated with alignment to the universe for you?

I am on the plane heading home as I write. When I get there I have a class to prep for, animals to love, clothes to wash and memories to keep. I also am beginning a new chapter; one I am super excited to experience, thanks for joining me on my journey.

xo

a

No Clouds

Howdy, I am safely in the Big Apple and ready to see folks and hear folks and do 'thangs' and what not.  I have to say that it is HOTTTT.  Like too hot.  90-100's hot.  I don't miss the heat living in Seattle.  I enjoy sleeping soundly in the cool temperatures we have there.  Waking up to this heat is sort of stressful.  You wake up knowing right away that you have to move according to the heat.  You are drained a bit before you begin anything and you (or at least me) try to find somewhere that has some air conditioning… because my brother's place doesn't have any.

I spent last night with my father, brothers (two of them), sister-in-law, two of my nephews and a groovy poet named Neiel.  My father's place is a creative person magnet.  On any given day you will find poets, dancers, singers, painters, writers, etc.  In all honesty, that also makes up my family (except for the dancers, we don't have any dancers in the immediate family).  The evening began with a listen to my father's new album, produced by my brother Pharoah (an amazing singer, writer and producer), with vocals by my sister-in-law & brother-in-law.  We danced, we sang, we had a blast.  My nephews got in on the action after they played a game of chess (the 11 year old beating the 14 year old and letting us all know about it).

What follows is a little over 5 minutes of a hilarious evening of acting/improv and just adorableness.  The poem is called "No Clouds" and as his father said, I would bet that it wasn't written down!  Ha…

Here it is: No Clouds

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vluKjB-Ev9I&feature=g-upl

xo

a