Love Not Fear

Happy Friday! The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure." ~Sven Goran Eriksson

Fear is unbelievably powerful.  Fear motivates us to change what we do, how we treat others, how we treat ourselves.  Fear will get us to give up our freedoms.  Fear will get us to hurt others.  Fear basically will kick our ass.  Fear also makes certain that love is lost.  With fear being present there is no space for love.  You are not allowed to live immersed in both.  Yet so many people will fall into love with someone based on the fear that there aren't any better options, that they should, that they need to be partnered at a certain point or age in life.  Fear will keep someone in an abusive relationship with someone else and/or with themselves.

Often we are afraid to be who we are, fully.  We show only the parts that are shiny and nice.  We hold onto and hide the parts that we have deemed unlovable.  We have taken the parts that we feel would push someone away and shown them piecemeal, after we feel secure that the person loves "us."  Well, what "us" are they loving if they don't have all the information?  What you have you given them the opportunity to fall for.  How would they stay with you when they don't know who you are?  What do we expect when we don't give someone the opportunity to know all of what they are getting into.  It is like we want to get someone attached and then show them the stuff that they would run from otherwise but won't now because they are obligated through promises made when ignorant of the truth.  Think about it.  Is that what you want?

Why would you enter into anything not being your authentic self?  What do you have to gain?  Well, it isn't always that black and white.  Most of the time we don't know we aren't being authentic, we just aren't accepting of who we are.  We haven't actually spent time loving up on the parts that we hide.  Yet, we hope that someone will love us enough to have to deal with the shit they never knew existed when they first fell in love.  We get into relationships and wonder why they don't work.  We leave or get left, we fear abandonment and aren't understood.  The truth of the matter is that the fear of being left is realized when we don't show up for ourselves.  When we abandon all of ourselves we don't allow others to stick it through with us.  We show others that we aren't worth staying.  When we deny the truth of who we are, others don't want to live that lie.  When we base our lives on who we want to be and not who we are we end up feeling lonely and lacking.  You must be the person you want to be with in the world.

What do you want?  How do you want to be loved?  Do you want someone who knows you, all of you and loves you because of it? Do you want to hide yourself and live a life pretending to be other than who you are?  Are you willing to accept the parts of you that aren't what you want to sing and dance about?  Do you feel worth putting yourself out there so that the one who will love you for all of it can actually find you?  When you hold back on who you actually are you don't give someone the opportunity to love all of who you are.  We are way to caught up with catching someone than being caught.  We are way to afraid to be who we are and have faith that we are worthy of love, deserving of unconditional love, destined for true love.  You are enough.  You are exactly right for someone.  You, all of you just need to come out of the dark, let go of the fear, walk towards yourself with open arms, then show yourself in all of your glory to the world and let your love find you.

"Fear is faith that it won't work out."  ~Anon



Can You Hear You Now?

Good Evening :) We are all working towards becoming who we will be.  We are all discouraged at times and encouraged at others.  Sharing your journey, telling your story can be the catalyst for someone else to move forward.  Tell it, go ahead, be courageous and open.  Sharing is caring after all!  I encourage you to reply via email or through the blog post.  What is your story?

I was raised with the belief that we come back, time and time again, reincarnated.  I was also raised with the beliefs of the Yoruba tradition.  Polytheism, alters, gods with personalities, that was my reality.  It is what I remember the most if you were to ask me about religion in my life.  With that said, we were told, in every way, that we could believe what made sense to us.  I was interested in traditional religion, namely christianity, so I signed up for Sunday School one summer.  I remember ironing my clothes for school one day and burning myself pretty badly.  Honestly, that is the most I remember about going to Sunday School, that and the fact that I was bored out of my mind.  The great thing was that my mother allowed me to discover for myself what resonated with me in every aspect of my life.

Because I have a strong sense of discovering my own truth, I tend to feel comfortable with checking in with my inner self, my soul, my spirit, my guides to find the answers to the questions I seek.  I check in, daily, with myself to be sure that I am on my path, doing what I am supposed to be doing.  I never hear the voice of judgement or doubt, it is always a clear voice that urges me on.  I am very thankful for being in touch with that higher self, guides, or whomever, because I know that many people struggle to gather information about themselves.  So much confusion, so much stress, so much pain is felt because we are looking for answers outside of ourselves instead of realizing that the answers spring forth from within.  When you practice being your own savior you find that you never need saving.  This is true in terms of religion and other relationships.

Connection is key to finding the answers you seek.  When you remember that you are never disconnected from the source and that you are a part of the source, we all are, you have greater reverence for all things and people around you.  You see each moment as a gift to be opened, appreciated and moved on from.  Recognizing the impermanence of something/someone doesn't mean you don't value it, it means you recognize it.  It means you don't take it for granted.  It means you understand how profound each moment is, after all you won't get that moment back, ever.

With reincarnation as my understanding, learning is my driving force.  I take everything that happens (that I bring awareness to) as information.  It is important, for me to look at my world as the creation of my soul for my own soul's learning and development.

How do you take your moments?  When do you feel most connected?  How do you ask for help from your higher self/god/connection?



Welcome to my new home!

"When the student is ready the teacher will come." Years ago my mother said this to me. I remember that I understood her on one level and was happy to hear this lovely comforting idea. It is an idea that supports patience and faith. You will be given all of the answers when you are ready to receive them. If you don't have the answers you aren't ready. Basically, be where you are and accept that it is where you are supposed to be… for now. I just finished a bunch of behind the scenes stuff for my website. It is a blog for now and will grow quickly, I am sure, into a fully awesome website that offers much more than my daily thoughts, musings and inspirations. But, for now, this is where it is, where I am and what I want to share with you.

I began my blog journey about 10 years ago (or more) and never stuck with it consistently. I had a personal training client who told me to write. She had just had her first book published and the rights bought up by Teri Hatcher. After receiving a nice fat paycheck she told me about her journey. I remember saying to her how I had always wanted to write. My father is a writer, my mother is a writer, my sister can do whatever she decides to, my brothers are writers, singers, poets, actors, etc. (I have a BIG family). I remember telling her that I wasn't as good of a writer as some of my family. My mother can describe a spoon over two pages. I simply don't have that kind of language for describing things in detail. She told me that I wasn't my mother (which I was relieved to hear (I LOVE YOU MOM)) and that I wrote differently, which was great.

Now, skip ahead to now. I have, for many years, known that I would write. I have so many plays either finished or barely started, screenplay ideas sketched out and journals upon journals. Finally, now, I am ready. You cannot fake being ready, you cannot skip ahead to the future. You have to be where you are right now. So if that now is ready to write, then I am now ready to write. My teacher happens to be anyone who reads my words and loves them, hates them, agrees with them, sees spelling or grammatical errors in them or is indifferent. You are all able to teach me because I am ready to learn.

So thank you! I hope you enjoy all, some or none of my posts! :) It is your choice always.