development

What's Good???

Good morning! It is Tuesday!!  :)  Try it!!  Seriously.  Your world changes when you see what is GOOD in it. This only  takes a few moments to do but gives to you for much, much longer.  So put down whatever you are doing and take a couple of minutes for yourself.  Every Tuesday morning I am going to ask you to write down 5 things that you are grateful for and email them to me (keep for yourself as well).  What are you feeling gratitude around?  Here are mine for this week:

Change.

Astrology.

Magic.

Fresh Fruit.

Reflection.  

There are no right or wrong answers.  It is about what you are grateful for.   It is proven that doing this once a week for three months (actually just 9 weeks) makes you happier, healthier, exercise more and less sensitive to perceived slights.  You will sweat the small stuff less and focus on what really matters.

So… what are you waiting for???

Food for thought:

I said goodbye to one part of my life today… and hello to the next step.  I have always had a hard time moving on from one thing to the next despite the number of times I have done so.  There is always the feeling of letting someone down that I have wanted to avoid.  The truth is we all benefit from change.  Change is growth and we all need to stimulate movement.  I have never gone backward, I have never slowed down, I have never regretted moving forward.  I love where I am and am happy to be steadily getting better.  Contentment and Ambition work well together when both are supported by and originate from love.    

See love, feel love, be love.

xo

a

No Pain, No Gain

Hiya, Sore.  I am.  I am sore.  Being sore is fantastic because it highlights areas I am not currently strong in.  It tells me that I am not there yet.  Wherever there is.  The workout I did is just an example of doing something outside of my comfort zone.  I can take that experience and apply it to other parts of my world.  I can look at various ways I have stretched myself or stayed within an area that was familiar.  I can see where I am sore emotionally, intellectually, and physically and know that I am growing, changing, learning and developing.  If I find myself in a place that is comfortable and I am not challenged I know there is work that is around the corner for me to see to, when I decide.

What have you done that recently that would get you sore?  In what areas have you challenged yourself?  Have you looked at what you thought you knew, felt and wanted and reevaluated it to the point where shifts occur?  Why have you or haven't you stretched past your regular, everyday routine?  What would benefit from you doing more than you have the day before, or doing differently?

Growth takes persistence, patience and awareness.  It also takes time and consistency.  Everyday you will be faced with the opportunities to do more than what you know.  You will have to continue to get sore, to do the work.  Change isn't usually an overnight thing.  My soreness will continue if I don't make the new workout a habit.  It is up to you to grab hold of the challenge, do the work to master it, and reap the benefit.

Have fun!

xo

a

Attached To It

"Better indeed is knowledge than mechanical practice.  Better than knowledge is meditation.  But better still is surrender of attachment to results, because there follows immediate peace."  ~Bhagavad Gita I am all about letting go of things except for the things I want to hold on to.  I think we may all be a little like that.  I realize that we get attached to how things are, no matter how much we aren't ok with how things are.  It is amazing how you can ask the universe to change or get rid of something, shortly thereafter get what you asked for and immediately begin to mourn your loss.  We are a complicated bunch.

I coach my clients to let go and cry about it.  I coach them to embrace the feelings that they have, accept them without judgement.  I encourage myself to do the same.  Attachment happens for most of us.  We get used to just about anything we are repeatedly exposed to or that we repeatedly do.  The issue isn't the attachment necessarily (though if you could do without it then woohoo!!), it is believing that the attachment means you cannot do without it or that you won't recover without whatever it is you are attached to.  We humans will run from pain much quicker than we will run towards happiness.  So if leaving something will cause pain we will choose to stay even if happiness is assured once the attachment wanes.

What if we chose to be courageous?  What if we chose to take the feelings that we associate with loss and assign different meanings to them?  What if the pain of losing something was associated with growth, development.  What if we didn't judge the pain of detaching as bad?  We could use it as a signal that we are on the right track, that we are becoming, that we are moving forward.  Life can be challenging and exciting and whatever you decide that it is.  Challenge pushes you to change.  Shedding habits, expanding ideas, transforming yourself… this is where freedom lives.

"Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached."  ~Simone Weil

xo

a

Getting Past It

"Change is inevitable, growth is intentional."  ~Anonymous Howdy!

We all have our personal areas of work.  Some of the areas of work for me are seeing what is and not just what could be.  I tend to get attached to potential, which works in my work, not in my personal life.  Others area may deal with food, money, love, lust, anger, etc.  I often hear people say,  after repeating something they 'used' to do, "I thought I was past that."  When I hear that an alarm goes off for me.  In that statement there are so many things that cover up what is going on.  First, there is regret and shame.  Second, the behavior that is being discussed was judged/deemed to be inappropriate, bad or undesirable.  Third it says, clearly to me, that we the person is approaching growth from the angle of getting rid of instead of accepting (because of the judgement).

When you are working on yourself and you are looking at something you are not pleased with, say you overeat when you are stressed (I totally do this… I also can under eat).  Maybe you have worked for many years to move to a place where you no longer use food as a method to handle, or numb yourself to stress.  Maybe it has been years since you have binged or withheld food around a stressful situation or event.  Then, one day, you find out something that sends you reeling and you find yourself buying 'comfort' food and eating it all in one sitting.  Or you find yourself refusing food and falling into a deep depression.  Once you are able to see the situation with some perspective you may feel like you have regressed or gone backwards.  This is only the case if evolution was about leaving all that you were behind.  I don't believe this is true.  I believe the concept of evolution isn't about getting rid of your history, I believe it is about accepting it and knowing that you are all, can do all, have done all.

When you move forward you aren't dropping off or losing pieces of who you were and what you have done.  You are taking it all and using it for future reference, to relate to others, to choose to use or not to use when you deem appropriate… to remember where you began.  Acceptance is one of the main areas of evolution.  Accepting that we are capable of all that we have done and so much more.  When you believe you have moved past something you are believing that it is possible to rise above being human in this human experience.  I feel like that phrase is actually the sign that you need to (and will) experience that 'thing' again.  It is like saying, I thought I had moved past using the bathroom… or breathing… or living.  Our lives, our experiences are not to be moved past, but to be taken in.  Seen.  Appreciated.  Given attention.  You move past things when you are walking, biking, driving.  You learn from and take with you your experiences.  That is what makes you, you.

When you realize you don't move past your behaviors you are better equipped to be aware when the ones you aren't keen on expressing begin to creep up.  You have the power to choose when to use the behavior or not.  When you accept that you are someone who is capable of using food to numb yourself you can remember to use food for fuel instead, regardless of what is happening in your world.

You will be faced with yourself (the parts you love and the parts you don't) time and time again; how you respond when faced with those things about you that aren't your ideal is where so much great work is waiting to be done.  Growth isn't about getting past something, it is about taking that 'thing'  by the hand and walking along your path, keeping it where you would like it to be; taking charge of all of you.  Using the experiences from the past to help guide you towards your desired future is why I believe we remember anything at all.

"Growth begins when we begin to accept our own weakness."  ~Jean Vanier

xo

a