To Oba With Love
Howdy, I love my life. I love my family and like them most of the time. I value my relationships but haven't always shown that to each person in my family directly. I come from a very unique family… don't we all? Among the 7 children there are two fathers and 6 mothers. Despite the number of adults in the family, the children have never questioned their belonging to one another. We are brothers and sisters period. I have never understood what being a half this or half that meant. We have a lot of cousins a lot of extended family that may or may not be blood related to everyone… but we are family and we love each other without reservation.
Tomorrow, one of my brothers is about to be married. Oba is 10 months younger and a touch shorter ;) hehe. He and I, at the moment, are the same age. There was a time when he told all of his friends that we were twins… that stopped when we turned 30… he was happy for me to be older at that point. We have always been close as brothers and sisters go. There have been times in my life where I wanted to be closer. Times where I longed for a bit more info on what his life was like. He is a boy and as such doesn't spend a ton of time chatting on the phone about his life with his sister, yet. I have a feeling that is gonna change as we grow and I am looking forward to that. He is one of my favorite people and just a super sweet human being. Everyone loves him, seriously. You can't not. He is just worth it. There has always been love, lots of love between us and mutual respect.
I remember when Oba and I were young and he would follow me around annoying the sh*t out of me. I would run down a hallway and he would race me in a race I didn't know I had started. He wanted to be better in some ways than me and I didn't understand what the deal was. My father told me that it was a form of flattery, a looking up to of sorts. I quickly began to appreciate his annoyance as admiration and love, thank goodness, otherwise I would have wanted to beat him up. Our family expects wonderful things from all of the children. Our being smart isn't amazing but it is appreciated. Oba knew all the capitals to all of the states and square roots when he was around 6 or younger. He was always ahead in school but clueless in the details of things. I could visit after an absence of a year and he would ask me where his socks were. His singing voice, though much better now, was unbelievably flat when we were kids, yet we belted out Sade like we were stars, any chance we got. We had fun growing up, hanging out, being together. Summer days in New York were sometimes spent lounging all over one another and watching TV. We are all very loving and tactile. It is something I appreciate more and more as I grow up. We touch and hug and show affection. So many people are out of touch, so to speak.
Now, he is getting married. He waited until he fell in love, truly, and that waiting did him well. His bride-to-be is everything I could have wanted in a sister-in-law and her mother is amazing too (love you Toni). I am excited to see him grow our family and grow as a person in this love. He is more open, more communicative and smarter for it. He is truly someone I adore. We have a lot more years to be in this life as brother and sister and I am excited to see where it takes us.
We don't always realize how important people in our lives are, especially those who have been around for the majority of it. We wait until something pulls us apart to recognize the value in it being held together. I have been that person too. Everyday is a new opportunity to value the relationships in my life, whether they are new or forever. Who in your world would smile if you let them know, without expectation, that you loved them absolutely?
xo
a