What's Good???
Good Morning!!! Tuesday Gratitude Practice is here!!! How will you take what you are grateful for through the rest of your day? This isn't just about writing it down and sending it back… put it out there! Let the world feel your appreciation! Let's make a difference.
This only takes a few moments to do but gives to you for much, much longer. So put down whatever you are doing and take a couple of minutes for yourself. Every Tuesday morning I am going to ask you to write down 5 things that you are grateful for and email them to me (keep for yourself as well). What are you feeling gratitude around? Here are mine for this week:
Amy Morgan and her magic. Breaker's Kids. A Day of Play. My Amazing Life. Rainy Days.
There are no right or wrong answers. It is about what you are grateful for. It is proven that doing this once a week makes you happier, healthier, exercise more and less sensitive to perceived slights. You will sweat the small stuff less and focus on what really matters.
So… what are you waiting for???
Food for thought:
Stop asking your partner to feel differently. We are individuals, even if we are married. If your partner is unhappy, feels angry, sad, happy etc. that is their RIGHT. You asking them to not feel the way that they do is selfish, not loving and actually inappropriate. You cannot blame them for your response to their feelings. Let me repeat, you CAN NOT blame them for how you respond to how they feel (and be healthy). Stop being a baby. Stop looking for someone else to figure out what it is your job to figure out. You are going to have to figure this out sooner or later… the world doesn't revolve around you. You decide how you feel based on your life and your feelings support your philosophies on the world. Change what you believe and your change how you respond. Yes, it is as easy as that.
Your feelings are YOURS and your partner's feelings are theirs. That is pretty simple to get, no? Ok then get it! What they feel never did, nor does it now, have ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU. If they say it does, they are mistaken and tell them so. If they say it doesn't, then YAY, they just may be a keeper. If you are confused about what is yours and what is their's then read slowly: If you are thinking it, saying it, feeling it and seeing it then IT IS YOURS. Is that clear? Yes, this is true. Please ask any and all questions you have about this as I know it is tricky for you folks.
Just because you are married or partnered in some way does not, I repeat DOES NOT mean that your partner will be able to comfort, understand, know, hear, listen, and support you in the way you need it when you need it. Being partnered does not make someone perfect, healthy, loving, understanding, happy, brilliant, a miracle worker, magic, fantastic, and immune to being human. Stop expecting what you won't give to yourself from someone else. This is the most important point… Are you taking care of yourself??? How in the hell is someone else going to do it if you aren't? How is someone going to respect boundaries when you don't set any? How is someone supposed to give you the love you have always wanted when you are JUST figuring it out??? Please, please, please think before you speak, reflect before you blame (and then just DON'T blame, it is no one's fault but your own as to why you are where you are) and forgive yourself for not being where you weren't.
You will be fine.
xo a