Your Growth is Personal
Hello! Everything in its place. True story. Everything is exactly as it should be at this very moment. I am sitting cross-legged writing, you are somewhere reading. This is all playing out just as the universe hoped. Everything is moving along at the pace that makes sense for it. One of the things that happens when we start our journey towards awareness is a desire to bring others along. It is natural when gathering info to share it and want others to feel the same sense of awe and discovery that you do. It is a part of our survival to want to help each other. This is fantastic and loving and natural. We fail to realize that growth isn't something that you make happen for someone. There are things moving along that you cannot see or feel and it isn't up to you to decide when someone is or is not ready to figure something out.
We do feel bad for each other way too much. We spend a lot of time pitying, wishing and hoping that someone figures this or that out. We say we want the best for whomever isn't moving along at the pace we have deemed appropriate. We say we feel bad for them not knowing as much as we do. We think that if they did they would feel better, see better, be better. Maybe they will once they are in the same place. Until then they are where they need to be. When working out, you have to begin where you are. If you have been moving your body for years and lifting weights regularly, working out is simpler than if you haven't really done much since childhood. Now if two people, one who is an athlete and another who isn't, go into a gym, they won't grow at the same rate. They won't be able to do the same things and will need to make their workouts separate insofar as the actual weights and movements go. They can work out at the same time, if their schedule permits, but the actual workout will have to take into consideration where they are individually. Wanting either of them to be in different places is neither here nor there. Now, do you feel bad for the person who never worked out? Why? Maybe they spend a lot of years raising children and didn't have a lot of time for the gym. Maybe they lived in Antarctica and didn't have a lot of opportunity for movement. Maybe they aren't you. Maybe their life is playing out for them to learn things that yours isn't trying to show you. There are other lessons in life besides the ones you are learning. You aren't the center of the ALL. You are a part of it, and in you there is a center, but you aren't what we all revolve around.
Often we want others to move along at our pace so we don't have to say goodbye to a relationship that may not fit anymore. Just as pants get too big when you lose weight, sometimes relationships don't fit when you go through a growth spurt spiritually and emotionally. You may need to say goodbye to things that aren't for you anymore. You may need to let go instead of hold on. When you change how you see the world everything changes. It is a part of growth that we try to deny and instead force the same changes onto those we are afraid of losing. Let them go, if that is what is appropriate. That shift may be the catalyst for a growth spurt of their own.
When you see someone struggling, understand that feeling bad isn't necessary. That doesn't change where they are, or make you a good person. It makes you a bit egotistical actually. You are assuming that they would want to be you, or in your shoes, or in your place. If you want to be of assistance, find out what that person needs, and, with integrity, decide what your next move is. Most of all, let people live their lives without the added pressure of pity. Let people figure out, for themselves, what they need next. You can do more for others by sharing your story than forcing others to live it. Besides, you don't have your sh*t figured out, truly.
So here is to figuring your shizznit out without dragging others along kicking and screaming. Do your work and be the inspiration we all are capable of being!
xo
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